Faebles

by Kris Ellestad

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03:46
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04:42
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04:00
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01:25
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03:53
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about

Please enjoy the Smiley Smile equivalent of the record I've been wanting to make for the past 4 years. I have lost the energy and joy required to realize my final vision and it feels like time to share the wreckage with the world so I can move on to other things.

This is an album largely influenced by the unexpected death of a friend and the eventual death of my marriage. I wanted to make a beautiful homage to my friend, to my dying relationship and to myself as a person who often wishes he could jump out of his skin and into the ether. It's for every person living and dead who has suffered deeply. I imagine it's best listened to in solitude as it's intended to be heard from start to finish as a continuous journey. But you're a free person, do as you wish.

Thanks for listening. Thanks for understanding. Hope you can still enjoy the ride, incomplete as it is.

p.s. The album is unmastered and therefore requires a wee volume boost on your part for optimal enjoyment.

credits

released 25 August 2015

Colin Stange - Drums, Moral support
Clea Anaïs - Cello (2, 6)
Foon Yap - Violin (1, 2, 6)
Jennifer Crighton - Harp (3)
Jonathon Wilcke - Saxophone (3)
Peter Hemminger - Bass Guitar (3)
Kris Ellestad - Vocals, Guitars, Bass, Piano, Reed Organ, Kazoo, Nose flute, Tin whistle, Mandolin, Accordion

Recorded by Kris at Hexagon Studio and Public Lunch Studios by Patrick Palardy.

All drum arrangements by Colin Stange. All string arrangements by Kris. Choice electric guitar lines written by Colin Mitchell for tracks 5 and 7. Haunting harp line on track 3 by Jennifer Crighton. Sweet descending bass lick on track 3 by Peter Hemminger. Sexy spooky sax by Jonathon Wilcke on track 3.

Cover art by Kiarra Albina.

Unlimited thanks to Colin Stange for being my partner in creating this music as you hear it today. Without him this record wouldn't exist at all, nor would it be in any particular tempo.

Thanks to Peter, Jennifer, Foon, Clea and Jonathon for your beautiful contributions to the album, I'm glad to have you all in there with me.

Deep gratitude to Pat Palardy for making the tail end of the recording process so comfortable and breezy and for teaching me all kinds of things about mixing, and generally being a solid human being.

Additional thanks to all the musicians who helped shape this music by being part of my ever revolving band: Mike Whittington (who helped me find the one bass note that solved the chorus progression in Endless Joy), Neal Moignard (who finished the "end" vs. "edge" debate), Luke Rashotte (for having endured my past incarnation of a band for NMIL and helping out when I started this project), Colin Mitchell (for stepping in on zero notice to learn my stuff overnight to play to a room of mid-wigs and provided some beautiful guitar lines that I ended up recording), Simon Fisk (the ringer), and Kenna Burima (who shared many a libation and provided the inspiration for the reed organ break in The Hanged Man).

Last but most, thank you to my family for the unwavering support.

All songs written by Kris Ellestad.

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Kris Ellestad Calgary, Alberta

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Track Name: The Call
In the weight of evening
In the void
I'm alone
I alone can hear the voice

A familiar face, a shadow
Calling from the water's edge
"Step into the river
Come around the bend"

Through this black night we're moving
Through sorrow
To meet the edge
Blue and horrible

Will I awake
Can I speak
To reach release
And let me be
Track Name: Three Sisters
Come now, come child
Come away to our shelter here down below
What drew you near
Was an echo of something cried long ago

Who'll carry me from injury
Whoever can it be

Hold on to our arms
Clutching the cloak of false alarm

Lay by the fire
And we'll tell you a tale told through augury
What you desire
Is a vision of grace and of destiny
The journey is long
And you'll carry your song through both high and low
But over yonder
Is just in the corner and you should go

Who, tell me who I'm bound to be
You who know what is to come

Pull now from our thread
Weave the sheets for your own bed
Track Name: Long Letter Day
Hold on, that's enough
I'll live for the moment
Can't breathe in the rough
Take me where the air is high

I sat on the ground
Lay down like a dead man
Gave up, that was that
So long to the roving eye

Wake up, leave your light on
Don't speak til the day dawn
Get up, get dressed
Underwhelmed, under duress

And after this
After that
After all the aftermath

It's a long letter day

Hear sounds all around
See eyes red and yellow
Cold wind through the trees
Lift me to the open sky

Turn my heart around
Help me build a fire
Blow smoke through my ears
Come hide here beneath the clouds

Got food, I can't eat it
Got love, I don't need it
Passed out, past my prime
First to fail, last in line

And after this
After that
After all the aftermath

It's a long letter day
Track Name: Peacemaker
Slow down
Wait it out
Come tomorrow, I will borrow
I will borrow, come tomorrow

And he believed
Faith unhallowed laid him fallow
And who relates at all?

And the peacemaking eye
Looking at me through all of it
Underneath the light
In the aquarium
Swimming in circles
All through the night

Come tomorrow, I will rise again

And the peacemaking eye
Looking at you and everyone
We know that it isn't right
In the gymnasium
Running in circles
For the rest of our lives
Track Name: Letdown
I've got a feeling that I'm not enough
There is a ceiling and you are above
I've been away for a long, long time or so it seems
And now I'm begging to get back in

Don't leave me
Complete me
Believe me
I'll never let you down

I'm broken
Soft spoken
I know that
I'm gonna let you down

It's not over
Come closer
When I'm older
I'll never let you down

If we're done
You should run
While you're still young
I'm gonna let you down

Holding on to a daydream
How long has it been

Another moment has moved to the past
Our little story secret and vast
I took the trouble of pushing it down
But now it's bubbling up again

Don't leave me
Complete me
Believe me
I'll never let you down

I'm broken
Soft spoken
I know that
I'm gonna let you down

It's not over
Come closer
When I'm older
I'll never let you down

If we're done
You should run
While you're still young
I'm gonna let you down
Track Name: The Hanged Man
Hangman says the road's washed out
Can't turn back without a doubt
Even if the way was clear as water
The rope is tied and god is late

Silent still for the last words
How did I spiral downwards

As my sun begins to set
The beast demands I pay my debt
But the moon will bring a great reflection
Mirror mind, protect my fate

Holding on til the last turn
What is it that I won't learn

Heed the wrathful bells
We'll arrest ourselves
On the carousel
To the depths of hell
Track Name: Ship of Bones
Pride and jewel
On the open sea she sails
You're a funny fool
In the belly of a whale

Dead and gone
Or hanging on
If you're here
It won't be long

Breathe and breed
Clothe and feed
Is all that I can do now
Indeed

Right and true
Will I ever reach my home
How do you do
I long to leave this ship of bone

Common ground
To be found
Lies below
Without a sound

Destiny
Come to me
There's nothing I won't do
To be believed
At last released

We are born violent
Called to wreck, sent away
From the womb torn and rent
Brought down in full bloom

Siren call, speak my name
Draw me to your stone
On a wave white and tame
Silent we fall in full bloom
Track Name: Endless Joy
Who leads a life of endless, prevailing joy
Who deals in dead relics and broken toys

All I need's a way to end this forsaken tale
Could it be the path's a winding, repeating trail
You who bleed and call it wine live beneath the veil
Of a sun cold and pale

Don't mind me on the other side
Don't mind me on my own, she cried

All this time we ate the world and it ate us
But it never could relieve what the hunger was
When we leave celestial bodies will shake the dust
From its sleep
Track Name: Dance of Death
We'll go whirling, tilting, twirling
Flying through the air
Over land and sea and cloud
We're off without a care

So we do the dance of death
Giving our last goodbye
Carried with the final breath
Lifting us to the sky

Holy day or holy night
No matter where or when
As the music starts to play
His hand will draw you in

So we do the dance of death
Ever and on we turn
Nevermore the call to rest
Sleepless is our return

Seasons come and seasons go
And time it touches all
Though the hour is not for certain
Each of us must fall

So we do the dance of death
Laughing along the way
As the needle pulls the thread
So will we never stray

So we do the dance of death
Life it is but a song
Learn the tune, proclaim the news
Sing it until you're gone